Welcome to Functional Couple Friday with Mark and Christine (follow her on Facebook: Delicate Flower)! She is 41 and he is 44 and they have only been together since Jan 2013! Newlyweds! They have four kids between them: her 7 and 10 year old, and his 13 and 16 year old (but she says “to us they are “ours” not his and/or mine”). They have a sweet story and I know you’ll like them!
1. How, when, and where did you meet and what is the first thing you thought about your partner when you met?
Christine: We were set up by my neighbor/Mark’s best friend. He convinced me to come to his house so he could cook for me. I had just gone through a break up so I wasn’t really “all in”, he changed that for me pretty quickly. The first thing I thought when I saw him was I liked his wild hair and that he was taller than me.
Mark: Blind date set up by a friend. We had dinner at my house. I don’t think either one of us expected very much and I had no interest in settling down. But the moment I saw her, I knew she was the one!
The funny part was the set-up to this date. My best friend (who I have known since I was 10) and I were sitting at the airport bar at OIA waiting to board the plane to go to the Super Bowl in New Orleans and he nonchalantly says that there is this girl I should meet. He said she lives down the street and seems really nice. I was like yeah, ok, whatever, I’ll meet her but no guarantees. We didn’t say more than 20 words about it.
He was right. She’s a keeper!
I think people who meet their spouses through friends are always happier, since you automatically have someone who approves of the relationship.
2. What is your favorite physical feature of your partner?
Christine: His hands. They are soft yet so strong and manly. Just a his hand on my leg makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. And safe. Very safe.
Mark: Her smile.
Oh Christine, you are totally going to gross out your teenagers if they read this. But it’s sweet.
3. What is your favorite personality trait of your partner?
Christine: His heart. I’ve never known a kinder man. Let alone dated!
Mark: Her loyalty.
Very nice!
4. What is something your partner does nearly every day that makes you happy?
Christine: He makes my coffee every single day. We call it love in a cup. He shows me love in so many ways. This one kicks off my day! Oh! And can I say one more? He totally supports all my wild “hey…you know what I should do” antics. Those pretty much happen daily too.
Mark: She lays her head on my shoulder every morning before we get out of bed.
These two have a blinking NEWLYWED sign over their heads. I think birds chirp and flutter around them as they walk. Ah, love.
These two have a blinking NEWLYWED sign over their heads.
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5. What is the nicest thing your partner ever did for you, in your whole relationship?
Christine: Wow. That’s kind of hard because is so thoughtful and kind in general but I am an army widow and that comes with many extra challenges. He has opened his heart to not just me but every single facet of my life. He fathers my children as his own, he allows us to mourn and celebrate my first husband, he even posts a tribute to him on his Facebook page every Veteran’s Day. He never makes me feel like I would be perfect if only……when he looks at me I can tell he thinks I’m the most beautiful woman in the world and he loves me just as I am. (sorry….that’s more than 2-3!)
Mark: She said yes when I asked her to marry me. Then she proceeded to freak out for a few weeks. But it’s all good now.
That’s nice about the Facebook page. I wonder why she freaked out, maybe because you got engaged quick. I should have asked how quickly- you guys seem like you were in a passionate whirlwind!
6. List the top five best qualities of your spouse: physical, emotional, mental, anything.
Christine: He treats everyone he encounters as he would like to be treated, he has a quirky fun sense of humor, he’s really handy, got a great mind for details and he’s damn sexy!
Mark: Her loyalty, her strength and her frailty, her openness, she’s classically beautiful, and socially adept yet very shy.
Sounds like Christine is the perfect woman. Or is Mark the perfect man for writing that description? Either way, don’t read this column on a day when you’re annoyed with your own spouse and have access to sharp implements.
7. What are the top five things you and your partner have in common? Values, interests, goals, etc.
Christine: We have the same retirement goals, the same view of finances, the same views on family (we openly embrace not just the family we are born with but the family we chose, however we agree that DNA doesn’t give you a pass for bad behavior and we will draw limits if we feel that we need to for our immediate family), we both love a day at the beach with a rum and coke, we both truly enjoy seeing the other happy.
Mark: Financial goals, parenting goals, value of hard work, exercise, and appreciation of the frailty of the world around us.
Same page here!
8. How often do you hug? Kiss? Have sex?
Christine: Hug and kiss….easily 4 times a day, we don’t leave the house with out it. Sex: anywhere from 5 to 10 times a week depending on the week but don’t tell our 16 year old, it’ll gross her out!
Mark: Can I just say a lot and cover everything? We hug and kiss all the time and have sex probably 6-12 times a week. Intimacy is a wonderful thing.
They are newlyweds, so I guess this is normal (?????!!!!!?????).
9. Which of you has a higher sex drive and how do you deal with any differences in sex drive between the two of you?
Christine: He does but not so much that it causes issues in our marriage. I’ve never thought “damn….wish I hadn’t done that” after we’ve made love! 
Mark: I do. That said, we each give and take based on what life brings us that day. Our family comes first.
Yeah, you’re sacrificing a lot there keeping it down to 12 times a week. I guess it could be 20 if not for having to drive the kids places.
10. How long did you wait to have sex? Are you glad you had sex for the first time when you did?
Christine: It was around 3 weeks I think. It felt like longer because we were together all the time. EEEK that doesn’t sound like very long!
Mark: We made a commitment to wait a month to see how the relationship was progressing. That lasted about 2 weeks and I have absolutely no regrets!
She says “around” 3 weeks, he says “about” 2 weeks, don’t read this if you’re their kids but I’m guessing 8 days.
11. What is the number one issue you fight about, and are you working on resolving it? How?
Christine: We don’t often “fight” but we do have frustrations around miscommunication. Mark and I have different ways of processing and regurgitating information. I tend to look at big picture and he tends to focus on the smaller details. Normally, we complement each other well, on occasion we are working toward the same goal but we don’t realize it because we are using totally different language and that gets frustrating quickly.
Mark: We learn a little something every day. Communication is the key and understanding the other’s language. I tend to soften certain issues and my wife is much more point of fact.
They are lying. They resolve it with sex.
12. What are the top three stressors in your lives?
Christine: Communicating with his ex-wife, being able to afford everything we want to do (but even that isn’t so bad because we do live a comfortable life. We have all we NEED. I’m talking WANTS!!)…I truly can’t think of a third…I mean we have a weird critter living in our attic that keeps us up sometimes, but that’s about it.
Mark: Family outside our home, my son splitting time with my ex-wife, and the dog digging holes in the yard.
That’s so funny that they both picked to joke about an animal for #3.
13. What is one thing that you’re looking forward to as a couple?
Christine: Retirement so I can experience more life with him by my side-make up for lost time!
Mark: Coffee in the morning!
Who needs caffeine when you’re having sex 1.7 times a day? Also, whatever is in the coffee he makes, he should sell it to women all around the world to get up to that 12 times a week thing. Check back with me during retirement. If you’re still having sex that much I want to dedicate this column to you.
14. Fill this in: I am glad I married my partner because…
Christine: I truly fall in love with him over again every day, I’m happy-deep down happy. He’s given me the gift of not just him, but the gift of two more amazing children and his given my children the gift the best example of a father one could hope for.
Mark: life would not be the same without her.
I was going to make some more sex puns with the “deep down happy” remark but I’ll restrain myself. These two certainly are in love.
15. Give me one secret thought that you’ve never told your partner. Something you think about them, about the relationship, about yourself, anything.
Christine: Crap.. This is hard. I’m a talker. I over talk everything and have a Facebook page that essentially exposes every kooky thought I have. Ummm…..Sometimes when he holds our “my” daughter or does something particularly father/son-ish with “my” son, I shed a tear. I have closed my eyes and had visions him holding them even before we even knew him, like when they were babies, before their father had died, but in the vision, he is holding them and my late husband is standing beside him smiling.
Mark: We went to this quaint theater to see Casa Blanca on the big screen. We are sitting there eating popcorn and drinking wine out of a paper cup. It was all very romantic. It simply reminds me to “always have Paris” somewhere in my heart.
Aww this is like The Notebook in blog form.